We Build Character and Emotional Intelligence Through the Community We Create: Choose Words Thoughtfully

“You stayed with the job for a long time even when it was hard.  That’s called perseverance!”

“Remember the beginning of the year—when you used all capital letters in your writing?  Now look at how you use lower-case letters.  You worked diligently learning to write those letters.  You’ve really grown as a writer!”

“You wanted to shout out your answer when Joshua was talking, but you waited and didn’t interrupt.  That’s called self-discipline!”

“You came right on time today.  Thanks for being punctual!”

“You sorted all your papers and stacked all the books.  That’s what I call organization!”

 “I can see you're the kind of boy who knows how to be a good friend.”

Emotional intelligence is more important than I.Q. for success in school—and in life.

“Emotional intelligence …includes self-control, zeal and persistence, and the ability to motivate oneself.  And these skills, as we shall see, can be taught to children, giving them a better chance to use whatever intellectual potential the genetic lottery may have given them.”

“The question is, how can we bring intelligence to our emotions—and civility to our streets and caring to our communal life?”

Quotes from Emotional Intelligence: Why it Can Matter More Than IQ, by Daniel Goleman. Bantam Doubleday & Dell, 1995.

How do we use validating statements, encouragement and positive discipline when we talk to children?  How do we nurture emotional intelligence?

Consider these other valuable resource books:

• Bailey, Rebecca Anne. Conscious Discipline. Revised ed. Loving Guidance, 2001.
• Faber, Adele and Mazlish, Elaine. How to Talk so Kids Can Learn—At Home and in School. Scribner, 1995.
• Fay, Jim and Cline, Foster W. Discipline With Love and Logic Resource Guide. Love & Logic Press, 2001.
• Fisher, Bobbi. Joyful Learning in Kindergarten. Revised ed. Heinemann, 1998.
• Kohn, Alfie. Punished by Rewards: The Trouble with Gold Stars, Incentive Plans, As, Praise, and Other Bribes. Houhgton Mifflin, 1993.
• Nelsen, Jane. Positive Discipline. Random House, 1996.
• Paley, Vivian Gussin. You Can’t Say You Can’t Play. Harvard University Press, 1992.